Heart's on Fire

I wasn’t lying; my scale was.

406

Yeah, I was horrified and disgusted; more so than when I went over 300 pounds about a decade ago.  The difference is I was relatively healthy then.

Random Thoughts

Sometimes I just say something that makes me look like a prick.

The Eyes in My Dreams

I, Todd Lorenz, have successfully written my first book, and I think the plot is rather interesting. 

Thank you.

It was truly an emotional outpouring that moved me, and it's what inspired this post.

Two Recent Supreme Court Decisions

I think I'm going to take what may be a somewhat different stance on both these issues: We're missing the fucking point.

Fear

I'm afraid of continuing to fail.  It fucking hurts.  It's demoralizing.  I really don't wanna do it any fucking more.  If history is any indicator, my only real option is not to try.  That ensures I won't fail.  Trouble is that little spark of hope, that flicker of a dream, that one last fading ember in the dying fire of optimism - it never quite goes out. 

Whiny city, bitch.

I'm 45 now, and there are far fewer days in front of me than there are behind, and it really is much easier to just sink into my reclining couch and let some form of oblivion on television lull me into a near comatose state where my inner pain and turmoil are both temporarily shoved aside in favor of some form of bullshit entertainment in high def video and digital surround sound.  

Time flies...

I finally broke down and went to see a dr (well, ok - physician's assistant) because my fucking throat was bleeding.

 

Ignoring the Mainstream

while I believe there is some truth in that statement, it would be more accurate to say that I just don't give a fuck about whatever happens to be mainstream most of the time.

 

Mistakes

Humiliations I've endured haven't driven me to therapy or broken me down permanently; they have served as learning experiences.  I think that's the way it should be.  

 

Jeez.

No entires since October?  Is this thing working?  Is this thing on?

Religion

I'm not looking to start some massive theology discussion, nor am I trying to hurt anyone's feelings. But..I just don't get it.

Birthday Thoughts

Fair warning; this is a rather long, entirely self-indulgent (even for me) entry.  But hopefully, it leads to a stronger resolve. 

Same Old Song and Dance

Some days it's worse than others; lately, it's been a real bitch...

New Project?

...If you're familiar with the band Hayseed Dixie, this is almost what I have in mind. I just have no desire to make everything into a bluegrass song...

Life is Short

Life really is a terminal disease...

Fire Breathing Reptile

And, I apparently still get pumped up by Godzilla...

Still Going

 So, I find myself now at a point where I really don't want to keep making the same mistakes...

21-1

I sit here watching a replay of WrestleMania 30 on the WWE network, a 44 year old fan with mixed emotions about a form of art I've loved (on and off) for roughly 28 years...

Time After Long Black Veil

If I say the name "Barry White," what comes to your mind? 

Making Memories

I guess my point is that we all have things we loved as kids that carry over...

Another Short Entry

I am officially sick and tired of winter and cold weather...

A Short Entry

The gig last Friday went quite well, and thanks to all who came out. 

Choices

There’s no going back, there’s no return - there’s just my life...

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Booking

For bookings, please use this email address:

booking@toddlorenz.com

 

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